pushovers Day 1: "We have to establish a rule. No dog on the furniture. Ever. Right? Right. And under no circumstances is the dog ever to sleep with us in bed. We are firm. These are the rules." Day 1.5: "Oh, OK, dog only allowed on the couch if one of us is holding her on our laps. Because of the irresistible cuteness of the dog." End of Week 1: "It is only natural that the dog would want to leave our laps whilst on the couch and walk around on the cushions, due to natural instinct to explore. We cannot quash our dog's curiosity! Therefore, dog is allowed on the furniture if we are on it simultaneously." Week 2: "Lifting up the dog to join you on the couch while watching TV is acceptable, due to natural need to snuggle with warm furry things while mocking the stupidity of characters on 'The Real World.' Fuckin' Trishelle, get a brain, why don't you?" Week 3: "This doggy gate outlines the borders of what in our house is considered Doggy Territory. Under no circumstances is the dog to leave Doggy Territory unless on a leash. And the dog is never, ever to enter the computer room." Week 4: "She was whining outside the door while I was working on the computer, so I let her in. And then she just lay at my feet while I worked. So good! I can't help it if she wants to be near me, right? She won't get into any trouble in here." Week 5: Dog gets into file cabinet, tries to eat wedding band contract. Week 6: "Did you see that? The dog jumped up on the couch! She's tall enough to actually jump up onto the furniture with a running start! Our dog is physically gifted! Do it again! Do it again!" Week 7: "Wow, I never saw a dog actually run around the entire room, leaping from one chair to the next, not touching the floor once. This could be a pretty good circus act." Week 8: Joe refinishes the step up to the balcony in the living room, the main exit to the outdoors, where Cooper does her dirty sinful business. "Well, we can't leave her to sleep in the living room as usual tonight, because if she tries to go outside, she'll mess up the refinishing job. So we're going to have to keep her in our bedroom overnight. She can sleep on the floor." Last night: This is what the pigs must have felt like in Animal Farm, when they kept changing the commandments. xo Michelle |
Tuesday . January 21 . 2003 . 11:06am |
pushovers Day 1: "We have to establish a rule. No dog on the furniture. Ever. Right? Right. And under no circumstances is the dog ever to sleep with us in bed. We are firm. These are the rules." Day 1.5: "Oh, OK, dog only allowed on the couch if one of us is holding her on our laps. Because of the irresistible cuteness of the dog." End of Week 1: "It is only natural that the dog would want to leave our laps whilst on the couch and walk around on the cushions, due to natural instinct to explore. We cannot quash our dog's curiosity! Therefore, dog is allowed on the furniture if we are on it simultaneously." Week 2: "Lifting up the dog to join you on the couch while watching TV is acceptable, due to natural need to snuggle with warm furry things while mocking the stupidity of characters on 'The Real World.' Fuckin' Trishelle, get a brain, why don't you?" Week 3: "This doggy gate outlines the borders of what in our house is considered Doggy Territory. Under no circumstances is the dog to leave Doggy Territory unless on a leash. And the dog is never, ever to enter the computer room." Week 4: "She was whining outside the door while I was working on the computer, so I let her in. And then she just lay at my feet while I worked. So good! I can't help it if she wants to be near me, right? She won't get into any trouble in here." Week 5: Dog gets into file cabinet, tries to eat wedding band contract. Week 6: "Did you see that? The dog jumped up on the couch! She's tall enough to actually jump up onto the furniture with a running start! Our dog is physically gifted! Do it again! Do it again!" Week 7: "Wow, I never saw a dog actually run around the entire room, leaping from one chair to the next, not touching the floor once. This could be a pretty good circus act." Week 8: Joe refinishes the step up to the balcony in the living room, the main exit to the outdoors, where Cooper does her dirty sinful business. "Well, we can't leave her to sleep in the living room as usual tonight, because if she tries to go outside, she'll mess up the refinishing job. So we're going to have to keep her in our bedroom overnight. She can sleep on the floor." Last night: This is what the pigs must have felt like in Animal Farm, when they kept changing the commandments. xo Michelle |
(Not a pile of clothes) |
